1985 (BLUE SKY IN AUGUST 2010)

A new employee started on Monday of this week. Since I handled personnel/payroll, it was crude reminder of my status as senior citizen when I saw that she was born in December 1985. I don’t know whether it was the frequent pains and ache I have experienced lately or the fact that in a few months I will be turning 50, that made me more aware of other people’s age.

This week has been pleasant with sunny days in the high 80s during the day and comfortably cool in the evening. In the morning, when I drove to work, I had to wait for the school busses loading up the kids around the corner. I thought of my nephew and wonder whether he is excited about what he will be learning. I thought of my childhood in Viet Nam when shopping for school supplies meant knowing the right people in the black market. It is very different from the abundance of back-to-school sales in America.

During the day, while my husband worked in the yard finishing up his landscaping project, I reached part of my clutter-reduction goals. The last few months, I kept up with my weekly donations of clothes and stuff to St. Vincent de Paul Thrift Store and dropped off at least a bag of books to the library. I am down from five to three bookcases. It feels good to lighten the load of earthly possession.

Have a good week, a safe and enjoyable Labor Day weekend.

TOTA TURNS 4

Exactly 4 years ago, August 4, 2006, TOTA was born in the beautiful downtown Bath Beach (Bensonhurst) Brooklyn, the Great State of New York. Special thanks to Qaptain Qwerty, to the Lone Gunman, aka Sal, to the two loyal followers, unknown faithful readers and other visitors - your support is much appreciated; let's celebrate this important milestone of TOTA's 4th Birthday/Anniversary.

I read in a book about the Navajo that “The number four is very significant and is found throughout Navajo culture and religion. There are four directions, four seasons, four original clans, and four colors associated with the four sacred mountains. Most ceremonies consist of four songs or multiple of four songs.” (From our recent road trip to New Mexico and Arizona, I became interested and have been reading about the Yavapai, the Navajo, the Apache, the Hopi, and the Pueblo.)

I like to post TOTA's First Entry on Friday, August 4, 2006, just like parents looking at baby photos and see how their child has grown.
"Hello, world! It was a dark and stormy night... THANKS to my little brother, L. I finally created my very own blog. Not much to write yet. I am visiting my family in New York, enjoying my little nephew J. , spending time with my Mom. It is too warm for my thinking - I will write more when I have a chance to put on my writer hat." Thank you, Qaptain Qwerty, for your help from the beginning and continued support.

However, the Chinese, in both Mandarin and Cantonese dialects, do not care for number four because they believe the word for the number four sounds like the word for death. They avoid number 4 like some people avoid number 13.

Although I am Vietnamese-born of Chinese ethnic, having been in America more than 30 years, I chose to believe and prefer the Navajo’s positive meanings associated with the number four.

Please join me in the celebration of TOTA turning 4. I will keep blogging and I hope you will keep reading.

ENJOY TODAY!

This is another plaque placed along the protected rails at the Old Chain of Rocks Bridge. It is a reminder that we should enjoy today and each day. Whatever your hopes, dreams, or how bad the current situation might be, whether you are spending your time on a yatch or loading all your belongings on a beat up jalopy, even if all you have is a bus token, as long as you have a support system, people who really care about you and most importantly to me is my faith, I will enjoy today and be grateful for all the blessings in my life. How do you plan to enjoy today?

LIVE YOUR DREAM

I don't know who Cyndi & Bill Weiss are but I like what they chose to put under their names "Live Your Dream". The plaque is one of the many placed on the guard rails at the Old Chain of Rocks Bridge. Most are memorial plaques while some are for anniversary or to commenmorate other important events. I wonder what the Weiss' dream was and how they actually lived their dream.
Over the years my dreams have changed from a simple dream of being a journalist/teacher when I was growing up in Viet Nam, then after survived the boat journey, seven months in the refugee camp, the first few years in America, I dreamed of becoming a nurse so I could volunteer for an assignment going back to the camp to serve the refugees that were still left behind. (That was the 20 years old naive and foolish me!) Somewhere along the way, around 1984, after a few years living in America, my dream turned 180 degrees to self-serving goals of being a "Yuppie"! I wanted a good life with money, fancy home and social status.
In 1987, a Spanish professor encouraged me to sign up for an internship program with the United Nations. She told me it would be a great match for my language and cultural knowledge of Vietnamese/Chinese and since I majored in Communication/Political Science, I should consider a career as a diplomat. I completed a year of internship with the UN in 1988 and in 1989 I got married and moved to Grand Haven, Michigan! (That was the "smart women foolish choice" me after I became blinded by the silly thing called love!)
I don't remember the last time I became passionate about living a dream. It was almost as if I just treading along, accepting whatever handed to me instead of setting goals for what I wish to become. Sure, I had a few good years of the limelights including being featured on the front page of a national magazine, getting a person-of-the-year award and 15 seconds of fame from articles I have written for local newspapers. Now at the age of 49, I could not formulate what my dreams are and how I wish to live out the rest of my life? It was as if I have become frozen, rusted, unable to move beyond the trapped door of complacency.
Should I follow the steps of Ryan who ran from Amsterdam, Holland to Athens, Greece in the summer of 2009? (Ryan completed his run in October 2009, but you could read about his interesting stories at http://www.ryanrunseurope.blogspot.com/)
Or Teresa, a school teacher who gave up all the security to live on a sailboat to explore simple living. (You could visit Teresa at http://www.sailingsimplicity.com/).
Or I should look beyond my own needs, stop being selfish and dedicate my time and energy to serve others instead of being self-indulgence. There are millions of good causes that could use more volunteers and financial support. Excuse me, I think it is about time I take my sorry a$# to the back of the shed and give it a good whipping.
Would you like to share your dreams and how you plan to live life to the fullest?

HAVE YOU MISSED ME YET?

I thought of giving the title "TOTA is Back from the Wonderland" to this entry as I have not updated this silly boring blog of mine since "Alice in the Wonderland" entry almost 10 days ago. I decided on "Have you Missed me Yet?" because I believed the title might be more fitting to how a lot of people in this country are feeling right now. I have no excuses for not blogging. I hope my adoring fans will forgive me. Just like my mother would have commented that since I did not have children, no pets, plus I don't cook, it sure does not take much time to clean my little humble poor house, I should have plenty of free time. There are only two people in the house, how much chores could possibly be that would keep me busy. Instead, I wasted so much time watching hockey games, planning for our next trip on Route 66 to Arizona and staring at the wall while the world passing by!
The truth is I did not feel like blogging. I just could not come up with anything clever to write. The fact is I could not think of anything worthy to share, not even cheesy photos, not something that could be silly, or remotely humor, I just was not in the mood. These photos taken last year of the rabbit resting in the cool shade on a hot summer day, not a care in the world, not moving its little ears even when I came very close. That was exactly how I felt, just being in suspended state of doing nothing, just floating around in the universe, without purpose or meanings of what tomorrow should become. Well, I did take care of a few things. Last weekend, I "floated" to the mall to drop off six special occassions dresses to the Metro St. Louis Cinderella Project - Prom Dresses with a Purpose. This is the 2nd year of the program collecting donations of new or gently used dresses to be distributed to high school young women of financial limitations. One of the dresses was a nice hunter green dress that I wore to my brother's wedding more than 10 years ago. I think I wore it again at a niece wedding and to a few Christmas parties. There were two little black dresses I last wore more than 20 years ago. A red dress I wore to a formal dinner on our Alaskan cruise almost 7 years ago. The rich color dress is no longer appropriate for my age. I gladly handed the dresses to the lady at the collection desk. I hope some young ladies would find the dresses to their liking.

It was a busy week with a few evening activities. Wednesday night was work-related and I spent Thursday evening at a Visioning Session to provide comments on land use changes, infrastructure improvements and economic development strategies along the corridor of the main road. Everyone agreed that we need to improve traffic control, enhance the roadway, making the road safer for pedestrians and a need for designated bicycle paths. After the meeting, for some reasons I was not able to get some rest that night. I probably had about 3 or 4 hours of sleep the most. Friday night was not any better and by Saturday afternoon I was so tired that I went to bed at around 2 pm and did not get up until Sunday morning, just in time for noon Mass!

DEEP THOUGHTS (WHAT ON EARTH AM I HERE FOR?)

I saw the above sign, "40 Days of Purpose" with the question, "What on earth am I here for?", while walking around Cayman Islands. I was there in March 2006 and the question was posted as a call to real conversion and spiritual renewal during Lenten Season at Elmslie Memorial United Church (Presbyterian/ Congregational/Disciples), Established 1846. I found that it was ironic to see this sign here in Cayman Islands, a place well-known for offshore accounts, money laundering, tax havens for individuals who don't believe in paying taxes. I wonder how many people, mostly tourists who walked around the Islands seeking pleasure and sinful gratifications, would even notice the sign. Those who saw the sign, myself included, would anyone even take the time to reflect on the answer to such question? Days after days, we get up in the morning, going thru the routines to get ready getting to our workplaces. Do you look around at the people you work with and what's on your desk/computer, and ask "Is there something more?"? At the end of the day, when you leave the office, after wasted 8+ hours of your life, is there peace in your heart or a sense of fulfillment that your work has created some good? Is there a higher good or a calling to serve others? So many times when I sat in meetings, listening to the discussions, I wanted to ask the questions, "Is that all you people care about, making more money, how to get what you want and the hell with everyone else? How do you justify the company paying a few hundred dollars on a round of golf for a few directors and then taking away someone wages, who really needed the money to feed his family, just to save a few dollars? YOU LIED! Sure, you talk about CEOs who received big bonus and called them greedy, you yourself are as greedy when you gave yourself year-end bonus and then slashed the employee's salary by 25%. YOU LIED! Is the only way you feel better about yourself by degrading others and constantly making demeaning comments?"

I have been asking myself these questions, "Do you do work that is meaningful, work that has a purpose, work that bring comfort and care to others, work that bring greater good to society? Do you worry about your investment more than losing your soul to the devils? How big are your suitcases to pack all your earthly possessions when the time come?" I actually know the answers but I don't want to admit that I knew what I should do. Just like the rich man who heard what Jesus says, "If you want to be perfect, then go and sell your possessions and give the money to the poor. If you do this, you will have treasure in heaven. Then come and follow me.", but the rich man could not give up his wealth. "Amen, I say to you that it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God" Matthew 19:21-23.

Would you like to share your answers to the question, "What on earth am I here for?"?

ARE YOU TALKING TO ME?

Last Saturday my husband and I went to Red Lobster for our Lunch Date. As we followed the hostess to our table, we heard the phone ring and a young lady answered, "Hi! I am here with my mother. We are having lunch." From where we were seated, I had a direct view of the young lady (let's call her Rudy) and her mother. I also witnessed a sad picture of how technology when mis-used has destroyed the personal interactions and family communication. From the moment she answered that "important"phone call, Rudy spent the time talking to someone who must be more "important" than her mother because the next fifteen minutes the mother quietly ate her lunch, trying not to disturb her daughter cell phone conversation. Rudy was smiling while continuing her phone conversation and enjoying her lunch as if the mother was not even there. I was so tempted to walk over and ask if the mother would like to join us at our table since her daughter was so busy talking on the phone. When both finished their lunch, Rudy took care of the bill, she was still on the phone, talking and walking out of the restaurant, with her mother right next to her. In her mind, Rudy thought driving her mother to the restaurant and paying for her meal was good enough. Perhaps what I witnessed was a reminder that I should not allow technology to replace personal connection, not letting email replacing phone conversations, that I should shut off the iPod, the iPhone, the computer, the television, all the video games or any other electronic device and really be in the moment with my family, whether the person is next to me or 1,000 miles away.
These sculptures by J. Seward Johnson were on displayed throughout the City of Chesterfield from August to October 2009 as part of public arts development leading up to the unveiling of "The Awakening". I thought the sculptures would be fitting for this post about human interactions and family communication in the modern time.

SOLSTICE, CANTO C, CAKE

Since I am not as talented as Qaptain Qwerty, I could not put together some kind of fancy collage of photos for this 500th post. Instead I am posting the above sculpture of figures represents the number FIVE. This work of art is called Solstice (1982) by the artist William King, currently on display at Faust Park in Chesterfield.
Next is the sculpture Profile Canto C (1981) by the late Ernest Trova, represents the first ZERO, currently on displayed in front of Bank Midwest at 15500 Olive Boulevard in Chesterfield.

I did not wish to spend too much time looking for another sculpture representing the second ZERO, so the photo below of the cake would have to do. I said to my husband that he has hidden agenda, not to celebrate my anniversary coming to America, but he would not miss an occasion to eat cake (and ice cream too)!

A FEW GOOD PHOTOS

I decided not to go out on Saturday. The book sale at the library and getting new pillows were not high on my to-do list when it is freezing outside. My husband cleaned the snow off my car and offered to get it warmed up. (Before anyone wishes to give CP "Husband of the Year" award, don't! CP only made the offer out of guilt since his precious T-bird, his work benches and all the tools Craftman ever made, took up the entire garage. There was no room for my car and it has to be out in the driveway.) I spent the day re-organized all the 100+ CDs, into separate categories of photos taken from our trips on Route 66, visits to New York, Vacations/Cruises, around St. Louis, Sports/Hockey/Football, and Mics.

It was a glorious trip and we had so much fun that I love looking at photos we took during the Mediterranean Cruise and 3 days in Rome, in 2008 for our 19th wedding anniversary celebration. We did throw the coins backward over our shoulders into the Fontana di Trevi to ensure that we would visit Rome again. I would love to be in Rome at least a whole month, just to walk around, spending a whole afternoon at a piazza, staring at the Colosseum for hours and soaking in the wonders of this accient city.

From our private balcony, we were able to take great photos, such as the above image when the ship approached the port of Valletta in Malta.

Below - A sign in Tunisia showing the words "A bientot" with the carrot top over the letter "O", similar to one of diacritical marks in the Vietnamese language.

ANOTHER WEEK HAS GONE BY!

Another week has gone by, soon the first month, January, of the year will also be "gone". Where did the time go? What have I done the last few weeks? Not much, just the same old routines, 8+ hours at the circus, watching hockey games on ESPN and Versus or spending time in cyberspace in the evenings, then football (NFL playoffs) and taking care of errands on the weekends and dreaming of winning the lottery so I never had to put up with all the clowns, the donkeys, and the bulls at the circus ever again!
This is not a good week for the Red Wings and it does not look like it will get better. For the first time, I don't look forward to NHL post-season match-ups. What happened TOTA, we thought you were hockey fanatic? My ailing beloved Detroit Red Wings, is what happened. It was painful to watch the team struggles, even against lousy team like the Coyotes. It was not the first time that the Wings had a 2-point leads going into the third period, unable to maintain the leads, only to either loss in overtime or shootout. The last five games, the Wings had blown the chance of victory despite of having third-period leads. This time last year the Wings maintained a comfortable top spot, currently they are chasing other teams just to get into the last playoffs spot. It is killing my hockey spirits knowing that the Wings might not even make it into the playoffs this year. Well, I will try not to think about the Wings right now, I will think about it after the Superbowl. On a positive note, I have been pretty good at picking the winning teams for the NFL playoffs the last few weeks. (Another reason why I am depressed - my beloved New England Patriots, defeated by the Baltimore Ravens, could not get into the playoffs either.) I could have pocketed a few dollars if the guys would agree to place their bets. They all said that when it comes to football and hockey, they would have not any chance of winning against me! (The photo below represents what I love, America/American flag/National Anthem and hockey/Detroit Red Wings.)
I was looking for photos of bicycle rides as a way to provide moral-distance-support to Qaptain Qwerty and found these photos taken last December of the new I-64 Grand Opening. According to MoDOT, more than 2,500 people (we were among these brave souls) participated in the ceremony by walking, running, bicycling, dancing and some doing aerobic on exercise mats in the middle of the freeway. Last year, we also attended the first half opening and it was a lot of fun to be able to walk (it was the only time) on the freeway. I also like to watch the American flag, up high on the ladders, waving in the wind against the blue sky, courtesy of the fire department.

A COLD SATURDAY MORNING

Here is my Show and Tell weather report - freezing cold temperature, the proof is in the bottom photo showing the icicles hanging on the evergreen and the fresh snow on the ground from last night. You could tell that we have a very active backyard from the cute footprints of a rabbit, a bird and a cat or a small dog, on the fresh snow. Mind you, we don't live out in middle of nowhere farm land. Our backyard faces a rather busy street connecting the main road (MO-100) and secondary road, yet we have had the pleasure of "hosting" a fawn being born and a whole town of rabbits running around. (We provided shelter and food for both mother and child, but they never visited at Christmas nor even sent an email to say hi.)
I thought the photo below of the snow on our half-dead apple tree looks like a frozen smile on a face of an old person. What do you think it looks like? This summer, we plan to cut down this tree and plant another one but we have not decided on what kind of tree. Any suggestions?
I plan to go out later to a book sale at the library. I promise I will not make any new purchases without giving away the same quantity from my bookshelves. I probably should stop by the department store to get us new pillows. Perhaps I should spend a few more dollars to get the types that would provide therapeutic support. Any recommendations?
I will be back later with additional reports. This is TOTA, signing off from a freezing cold Saturday morning in St. Louis!

IT'S FRIDAY ON THE 13TH DAY OF NOVEMBER

I don't have an opinion about Friday the 13th or whether it is good or bad luck to do something on the 13th. In general, I am not a supertitious person. I don't walk under the ladder because I don't want something from the top of the ladder, such as a bucket of yellow paint like in the above sculpture by J. Seward Johnson, to fall on me. I don't believe that if you open an umbrella inside your house or indoor, it would be bad luck, I just don't want to break a nail opening an umbrella! I don't care to run into a black cat only because I am not a cat person and a black cat is not something pretty to look at. One time I pulled the number 13 waiting in line at the post office and then the shipping cost was $6.66 - both the postal clerk and I laughed about such coincidence and nothing bad happened to me that day, week, or month. So believe what you want to believe.
Here is what I found from Wikipedia "Friday the 13th occurs when the thirteenth day of a month falls on Friday, which superstition holds to be a day of good or bad luck. In the Gregorian calendar, this day occurs at least once, but at most three times a year. Any month's 13th day will fall on a Friday if the month starts on a Sunday. In 2009 this applies to the months of February, March, and November. The next year to have three Friday the 13th dates will be 2012."
This is kind of interesting since there has been so much talk about the year of 2012 that this will be the end of the world. I would not want to know whether this is true because hopefully by 2012, I should accomplish my lifetime goals of seeing all the NHL Original Six home games (I would not mind seeing a Canadian team, either Toronto Maple Leafs or Montreal Canadiens won the Stanley Cup before the earth or the ice rinks crashing down) and perhaps going to a Superbowl game again to see my beloved New England Patriots win another championship. So if 2012 is the end of the world, so be it!
"The fear of Friday the 13th is called paraskevidekatriaphobia,[1][2] a word derived from the concatenation of the Greek words Paraskeví (Παρασκευή) (meaning Friday), and dekatreís (δεκατρείς) (meaning thirteen), attached to phobía (φοβία) (meaning fear). The term triskaidekaphobia derives from the Greek words "tris", meaning 'three', "kai", meaning 'and', and "deka", meaning 'ten'. the whole word means three and ten. The word was derived in 1911 and first appeared in a mainstream source in 1953.[3]" these words of wisdom according to Wikipedia.

I did not take any photos of cats, so I post the above sculpture "Ricardo Cat" by Niki de Saint Phalle, a French artist. It is on display at Laumeier Sculpture Park.
Below is a photo of my shadow on a giant red ball in front of a store. I remember when I was a kid in Viet Nam, we were told by the adults that we should not play with our shadows like making gestures or making shadow animals with our fingers because we would have nightmares such as being chased by ghosts or monsters pulling us down into the abyss!

A WARM SUNNY DAY IN NOVEMBER

I decided to "suspend" the Route 66 Saturday Series this week to write about a wonderful sunny day we have today. The proof is in the photos with the thermometer showing the temperature almost reaches 80 degree as the sun shines brightly in our backyard. My husband was busy since early morning blowing and raking the leave to the curb, ready for the city's weekly curbside leaf collection. I complimented my husband for a good job with making the yard looking so nice without all the leave and also cutting the grass since it still is growing a bit after last week's heavy rain. Then of course, giving the T-bird a good wash. It has been "painful" for CP that he was unable to wash the T-bird right away after our trip to Oklahoma two weeks since he got a terrible cold plus the heavy rain last weekend; so he was very happy to finally got all the dirt off his "beloved" automobile. (CP is feeling much better, still has running nose and an occassional caughing.)
I spent the morning at various parks looking for more sculptures. I was at the library in the afternoon getting a few more books on Route 66 and on the history of the Dust Bowl. Later in the evening, we went to a Hot Air Balloon Glow at Route 66 State Park. It was a great experience and I had a good time taking photos.

FALL BACK - DON'T FORGET TO RE-SET YOUR CLOCKS

Don't forget to re-set your clock BACK one hour - it is FALL back this Sunday.
Here is a trivia question for my adoring fans - the above clock has an engraved MIAMI but in what State? Also, what is the correct pronunciation for this MIAMI town? (Hint - all the photos were taken along Route 66 - below is the clock on Jasper County Courthouse in Carthage, Missouri and bottom photo is the town square clock in downtown St. Clair, Missouri.)